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restaurant quotes funny

You’d think about what kind of food you want, and the table would move across the floor to it.” Steven Wright, “Come unto me, all ye that labor in the stomach, and I will restore you” M. Boulanger, 1765, Motto over door of first restaurant, “In the United States all business not transacted over the telephone is accomplished in conjunction with alcohol or food, often under conditions of advanced intoxication. It is best not to stir them.” P. G. Wodehouse, “I was at this restaurant. “A restaurant is a fantasy-a kind of living fantasy in which diners are … It said, ‘Soup of the Day: Cream of Asparagus. And I have found it wise never to recommend a restaurant either. They will make you laugh. Those are two classes of people who like to eat well and get their money’s worth.’” A.J. [in a whisper] I’ll have a cheeseburger and fries, please.”, An American tourist was lunching in a restaurant in China where the specialty was duck. It's chicken and eggs. There's just so much more to say than what's on the menu. You hungry kid?’ said Zaphod’s voice. ‘Okay, baby, hold tight,’ said Zaphod. Home » Quotes » 73 Famous Restaurant Quotes and Funny Restaurant Sayings, “A restaurant is a fantasy-a kind of living fantasy in which diners are the most important members of the cast.” – Warner LeRoy, “There are advantages to being a star though – you can always get a table in a full restaurant.” – Ingrid Bergman, “When you first entered the restaurant, I thought you were handsome… and then, of course, you spoke.” – Helen Hunt in “As Good As It Gets”, “I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. And I said, I gotta use that one.”, “I went to a fancy French restaurant called Deja Vu. What It's Really Like to Be a Restaurant Server? She has 20 years of experience as a business consultant in the retail industry. '”. So I ordered French Toast in the Renaissance.”, “When you go to a restaurant, the less you know about what happens in the kitchen, the more you enjoy your meal.”, “When I was a small boy, my father told me never to recommend a church or a woman to anyone. Funny Restaurant Quotes & Sayings . I’m halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God….I could be eating a slow learner.” Lyndon B. Johnson, 36th president of the United States (1908-1973), “Avoid restaurants with names that are improbable descriptions, such as the Purple Goose, the Blue Kangaroo or the Quilted Orangutan.” Calvin Trillin, American writer (New Yorker magazine), “I’m in favor of liberalizing immigration because of the effect it would have on restaurants. Julius Cesar walks up to the bartender and says “Give me a martinus” the bartender says “you mean a martini” Cesar says “listen if I wanted two I would have asked for two!”, First Man: “Waiter, bring me a cup of tea!” Second Man: “Bring me a cup of tea, too, and be sure the cup is clean.” Liebling (columnist), “Never trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.” Andy Rooney, “I never eat in a restaurant that’s over a hundred feet off the ground and won’t stand still.” Calvin Trillin, American writer (New Yorker magazine), “Anybody who doesn’t think that the best hamburger place in teh world is in his home town is a sissy.” Calvin Trillin, “The highway is replete with culinary land mines disguised as quaint local restaurants that carry such reassuring names as Millie’s, Pop’s and Capt’n Dick’s.” Bryan Miller (NY Times Restaurant Critic), “Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? The only problem is that an hour later you’re hungry for power.” Dick Cavett, “The best fame is a writer’s fame. '” Erma Bombeck, “I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. Here are funny restaurant jokes and puns. Ellen DeGeneres. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.” Steven Wright, “I went to this restaurant last night that was set up like a big buffet in the shape of an Ouija board. I’m halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God….I could be eating a slow learner.” – Lynda Montgomery, “Nouvelle Cuisine, roughly translated, means: I can’t believe I paid ninety-six dollars and I’m still hungry.” — Mike Kalin, “It’s easier to be faithful to a restaurant than it is to a woman.” – Federico Fellini, “In a restaurant choose a table near a waiter.” – Jewish Proverb, “The murals in restaurants are on par with the food in museums.” — Peter De Vries, “Eating at fast food outlets and other restaurants is simply a manifestation of the commodification of time coupled with the relatively low value many Americans have placed on the food they eat.” Andrew F. Smith, ‘Encyclopedia of Junk food and Fast Food’ (2006), “The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant.

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